Trusting yourself is important and I know that if you have long years of habit of looking at other people’s face first before answering, it will not be an easy change! You have to get used to your own opinion, to your own feelings and what comes up from inside then.
I said that people often lie because they don’t know their feelings. And I don’t blame them for this, it is the way how you grow up. Always carefully looking at what others think of you, trying to please everyone while never being able to achieve that. So it is no wonder that people start lying. It is however bad that they are not even aware of it.
Of course they don’t lie because they want to harm someone but of course they lie to hide the truth. To hide their thoughts, to hide their feelings, shortly to hide themselves. And there we go again with one of the greatest problems that a person can have: low self-esteem.
Why do you believe your opinion is worth less than any other person’s opinion? Many will answer ‘I don’t believe this!’ but look at how you act, how you react and how you interact with others. Realize at what times or with whom you are making yourself small. And as soon as you realize it, do something different! You will see, people around you will be surprised! Yes, it might be that some people with whom you always agreed before won’t like it if you say your own opinion for a change but those who respect honesty and those who love you will love it!
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Self-esteem is something that I am learning to understand, but that I do no yet know fully. My parents didn’t have much self-esteem either, trying to break this cycle and it is successful when you become aware and open to love. If you are open to love, then you’ll love yourself too.
This is a beautiful photo.
One of my friends, who’s lying tendencies always frustrate me, I think she has low self esteem. She lies about silly things like, whether or not she enjoyed a movie, or whether she prefers coke or sprite. I think she just wants to know what those around her like so she can fit in.
This is a good point, Swami. Some people lie out of their own lack of self-esteem, not because they have bad intentions. I think it’s easy to say that we should always express ourselves honestly when you are someone with a strong sense of self and personal opinion. But it’s good to remember that not everyone is beaming with self-esteem. They don’t mean to lie but they want to feel love in some way. If we give them unconditional love, maybe they won’t lie so much.