Defeat your Anger with Love – 20 Jul 08

Anger

Yesterday there was another 17-year-old girl here for a healing session. When I asked her why she was here she told me that she wanted to forget a boy. She had been in a relationship with him for one year and broke up with him because he is 'an angry person'. She said that she was still in contact with him and she just couldn’t forget him. I asked why she was still in contact if she wanted to forget him. If you meet him how can you forget? And she said it was so difficult not to be in contact. She was sure that he still loves her very much and she could not say that she did not love him. So this means there is still love in between them, just because he is short-tempered and often angry they cannot be together.

Nobody likes to be angry. Why do we have these emotions? You need to find the reason and either eliminate the reason or change the way that you deal with it. I do not suggest suppressing feelings, you know that. I wrote about anger before in my diary and if you compare love and anger, love will always win. So if you know what you want, if you want to defeat your anger, you can do it with love. And what would be a better reason than love?

So today we took a flight back to Germany and Andrea picked us up at the airport in Munich. In the evening we went to a musical performance that Susi’s school had organized and in which students were actors, singers, dancers and also playing in the orchestra, like Susi. It was the first time that I went to see a musical and I liked it very much. It was mostly in German so I did not understand everything but I enjoyed it nevertheless. I do not really like cinema or TV but this was a very nice evening.

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  1. Mr. Allen

    When I am angry I remind myself that to be angry is to suffer. If I turn my attention inward I realize that my body is stressed from this anger and my mind is not at peace. It helps me to realize that anger is created by a story in my mind. If I observe my inner dialogue I will often find a story recycling itself in my thoughts. From this thought the emotion anger arises in my body. I must take responsibility for this feeling. It is not something outside of me that has done this to me because a circumstance is always neutral. It is thinking about this circumstance that has caused me to suffer. Realizing this allows me to smile at my anger, not taking it so seriously. And so I feel much better as I cease to poison myself and others around me.

  2. Emily

    I totally agree with you, Mr. Allen. Your anger is still YOUR anger, even if you feel that someone else “caused” it. Even if someone else did something totally hurtful or careless, you still have to be responsible for your own emotions and reaction to it.
    Whenever someone says, “I have a problem with that person,” you can say to them: “Yes YOU do have the problem, and it’s up to you to solve it or else you walk around carrying resentment for the other person.” This doesn’t justify the wrong or hurtful actions of others. It just makes it easier to live with your own anger.

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