Thomas and Iris are here for the long weekend and after getting up in the morning today I had a kind of morning Satsang with Thomas. We were talking about being alone and feeling lonely. Here many people are afraid of being alone. However you hear very often the sentence "I don't mind being alone". And you can notice that those who claim this most often really cannot be alone because they feel very lonely. The culture, the society and the family structure here create it that people feel lonely.
So it is good or even necessary to achieve that you do not feel lonely. People want to train themselves for loneliness and make this affirmation "I can be alone". "I need my space" is another phrase which is often said by those who would actually like to have someone around them. The society makes it necessary and they prepare themselves for being alone. However, still, in the evening they go out and search company.
I never feel lonely. I was fully alone in the cave for more than three years only with myself and my God. And even before that I had times in which I was alone for a long time. When I was in Bombay I lived with a family and in their apartment I had a room with a bathroom attached. Daily for two hours, between four and six, people could come to meet me there. The rest of the time I was living in that room, the family gave me breakfast and dinner and apart from that I did not have much contact with them. It was nice for both sides, they did not disturb me, I did not disturb them. For a whole month I was there in that room and did not come out once.
I am like that. I do not need to go out much. Of course I love nature and it would be nice to be always in nature but I do not need to go out in cities for seeing things or people. I am not a tourist and I do not do sightseeing. I have been so many times in Bombay and was even living only a few hundred meters away from the main sight there, 'Gateway of India'. But in twenty years I never came there. Last year I saw it for the first time. I have been traveling in many countries but I never really was a tourist. I am also asked sometimes if I do not go out but I feel very good just to be here, with me, with friends, I do not need to be anywhere else.