I was writing about happiness but today is a challenge for me to be happy. I cannot say I am very happy because I see that the whole Ashram, all faces of our family are not happy because we are leaving. When I see these sad faces I want to make it more light, make them laugh and try to take away the heaviness of the atmosphere.
The Ashram is so busy on this day of leaving because everybody is helping in packing and searching things which we need to take. Like each time my grandmother, naniji, asks us if she will be alive when she will see us the next time.
This all I feel and try to balance myself but on the other hand I can also say that I am happy to see my friends again when I go back to Germany. That is also there. I have to accept both of these emotions.
Now it is getting hot here and I heard from my friends that the spring is coming in Germany, so we are also happy to leave and hope for nice weather there. So, as usual, these are my emotions on the day of leaving and somehow we are used to this. So tomorrow I will write from Wiesbaden.
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Awe! that is the saddest thing for your grandma to say. But I have heard of grandparents saying that before. How happy she must be every time you come through the gates again.