Travelling but afraid of making Mistakes in another Culture?

When our guests arrive at the Ashram, we always give them a short introduction into Ashram life, tell them who is who and let them know that they can just feel like home, relax here, go into the garden or wherever they want. We explain that we are very free and that they don’t have to do anything and are not prohibited from doing anything, they can just be, that’s it. Sometimes however people who are in India for the first time hesitate to really feel free – they have heard so much about what you should do and what you should not do in another culture that they are afraid to do something wrong!

It is just a natural feeling which you have more or less of, depending on your experience and your general character.

People who are very self-conscious and feel easily ashamed about their mistakes may have big difficulties even starting a journey to a country like India because they know the culture is so different that they will hardly be able to avoid putting his foot in. If they do come though, they will stay away from places where they don’t know the rules and customs for unless they are with a guide or someone who they can follow in their actions.

They will hesitate going into a temple for example, not knowing how to behave in it and whether someone might be offended by them even entering. With this attitude they ‘play safe’ but unfortunately miss out on a lot of things, simply because of their fear of doing something wrong. They will be able to avoid really offending someone culturally but if they actually do something that a native inhabitant would do differently, they will be horribly ashamed. That will be one of the biggest memories of their journey and each time they think of it, their cheeks will burn with the memory. Only time will be able to fix that and they will eventually be able to regret making this so important. Maybe they can even laugh about it and tell it to others – but only after some years and from safe distance!

Perfectionists would hate committing any faux-pas in another country just as much and that is why they read as many culture-guides as they can in order to know everything before. They have read so much that they believe they know how to behave anywhere and everywhere. With their theoretical knowledge, they can impress their fellow travellers and they can easily become the guides for locations they have not even been to themselves.

Obviously the knowledge of books and texts is not comparable to the experience itself though and sometimes you find such people wondering why everyone is doing things just so very differently from how they should be doing it! They stand at the evening ceremony at the river ghats and explain their friends how the priest lights the candles and holds the fire and swings it – wait, he doesn’t do it right! Seeing this controversy brings confusion and the perfectionist will mostly leave with the feeling that the natives are not following their own culture properly – he would have done it better.

The best attitude to enjoy and experience however is, if you simply jump into the life and go with the flow. Don’t hesitate too much and don’t have too many expectations on how it should be. Just let it happen and go along. Indians are known for their hospitality and they will be happy to show you, explain you and just let you know what to do. Don’t be shy or afraid of doing mistakes – they can see you are not from here and that is why they don’t expect you to know everything!

You can hardly commit a faux-pas that is so big and bad that people really could blame you to have done a big mistake. It is a difference of culture and if they came to your country, you would also not mind them doing things a bit differently than you do them. Just use your common sense and a little bit of a feeling for the situation and you will be fine. The most important thing is that you enjoy your time.

I believe we all should be more open towards others and take life easy. With such an attitude, we don’t need to be afraid of cultural mistakes but can really make beautiful experiences, knowing that others simply appreciate you exploring their country and culture. Enjoy and be happy!