Homosexuality and Personality Conflicts – 28 May 09


Once somebody asked me ‚What do you think about homosexuality?‘ I said ‘This is a very personal thing. It doesn’t really matter to me, everything is fully okay if a man decides to have sex with men, or a woman to have sex with women. It is just very individual and depends on the way they feel. There is nothing wrong with that. Everybody can have their own idea, thoughts, fantasy and taste. I have friends who are homosexual and I do not see any problem in that. It is also going on since thousands of years. We should accept this in a natural way.

But I am not really convinced with this concept when I see people dressing and behaving like the other gender, like a man dressed like a woman and behaving like a woman or a woman dressing and behaving like a man. This actually creates a conflict in their personality. It shows that they do not accept themselves how they are made by God. They do not accept their gender. If two men want to have sex with each other, why does one of them have to be or pretend to be a woman? It means that they are playing a role. They go back into the tradition and play a role of who they are not.

Of course they should be accepted by society but I think they should be confident about it. They don’t need to play the role of man and woman. Why can a woman not express their sexuality towards another woman? Why does she need to turn into a man then? I feel that if you do not accept yourself you are creating a conflict in your personality. I don’t see any problem if people have relationships with the same gender but why are you trying to become the other gender? Why can’t you be in the original way as you are? You can still and with honesty express your love in the way you want, if the other person is a man or a woman. This is what I always say: Accept yourself! It is a very interesting topic about which I would like to write more tomorrow.

We are here in Cologne with lovely friends. Antje, Joachim and their son Simon had the very nice idea of inviting 30 friends for today and have a ‘food for food’. This means we cooked for everyone a very nice meal and ate together and they could give a donation for food for the children in India. It was a really nice evening with lovely people and wonderful food. There were also many children and we are happy that they, too, enjoyed the food.


  1. Thomas Bucanan

    What is male and female clothing or behavior? When I visited India in 2006 I saw men wearing garments that looked like female skirts or carrying bags that looked like female purses from where I am from. In Africa men would dress in bright colored robes that have the same shape and color as Indian saris. In the West some women wear ties and some men wear blouses. These are “straight” men and women who feel that they are dressing for their gender. Swami Ji, I don’t think that what I am saying is related to your point (I have also seen a sickness in people that seem to be far from themselves, playing a wild and unfamiliar role when they choose to adopt gender characteristics that vary from what they grew into) . It’s just a side note that I find interesting. I have learned through gender studies courses that masculine and feminine behavior is as varied cross culturally as cuisine. Sometimes their are no shared characteristics from one community to another. WOW!

  2. Tanya

    If there was only one way for a man to dress and only one way for a man to dress then I would agree it was unhealthy. But in India men wear clothes that only women would wear. In the US if you like flowers or apreciate the color purple or wear anything that oesn’t keep one thigh from touching the other then you are straying from manliness. does that ring true about manliness to you? I don’t believe it would. It is different everywhere, in the US especially it is okay for a woman to wear whatever she wants. And in certain areas it is even okay for a man to wear whatever he wants (but not in many areas)I don’t think judgment can be drawn from the way people dress, not as an isolated indicator I mean.This is just something I feel strongly about because I am not convinced about all the differences between men and women. Aren’t there more similarities between the two than differences, as people? And also I wonder why it matters so much, but that has nothing to do with your post… just talking to my own mind here.

  3. Francesca

    I really likewhat you say about being confident about sexualdesires. That a woman should be open about sexual desires for another woman, and a man to a man. I often wonder how it would be if a woman could love a woman publicly anywhere. Still, it is possible but when people see it they often either hate it or at least think it’s a little strange. Maybe if more people were confident about it then it would be more ok?

  4. Brigid

    sometimes I don’t understand why everyone isn’t a homosexual. Men will only ever respect the intelligence of men so why don’t they be with men? I am just waiting for the day when women are finally done lowering themselves and making themselves look less intelligent and incapable for a man to love them. But the system seems to be inescapable. Doesn’t it. Thank you biology.

  5. Emily

    Again I would have to say that homosexuality and transexuality are two different things. Just because someone feels that they are a man inside a woman’s body doesn’t mean that they are gay or lesbian, and vice versa. And regarding transexuality, you say that they should just be who they are and accept the way God made them. But accepting their body would be denying what their soul truly feels. And honoring the soul tends to win over the body– so people change their genders.

  6. stu

    Dearest Swami Ji,
    Gender and homosexuality are different issues.
    Native American Navajo indians recognised at least four Genders. Male bodied people with a feminine essence were known as Nádleehí. Nadleehi were recognised for their gifts and special ability’s and took on a mixture of male and female dress codes. There was a corresponding position for female bodied male spirited people. To my mind, this is true acceptance of how people were made by god.
    So much hate crime has already taken place in the world against transgender people. Let us consider the wise and sane approach of the Navajo where we allow people to express their gifts and don’t suppress them with rules of dress according to what genitals they have.

    Respectfully and thanks for your time.

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