Stay Stable in the Form of Relation you have – 6 Nov 08


I was writing about relations and relationships. Another key for a successful relationship is to allow your partner to express their feelings the way they want. Love and relation is not about owning. You need to give this freedom to the one you love. I have said this many times already but of course the partner should also respect the feeling of the beloved. It has to come from both sides. This freedom has to be given to each other and you need to be strong, as I wrote before, in the kind of relationship you have.

If you project another relation into your existing relationship, it actually shows that there is something wrong in the previous relation. If you are husband and wife and after some time you say to each other that you are brother and sister, it proves that your existing relation doesn’t work. You could not take care of it. Maybe you have to think about it and search for the reason why this situation came and what you can do about it. Why couldn’t you enjoy the sweetness of your relation and why did you need to change your feelings? I am very positive in this way, if you really have the wish to find a solution, you will get it. You shouldn’t run away by projecting another relation.

Unfortunately I see this situation very often in relationships. Because of their love they want to keep the relation and want to enjoy the love. And when one relation doesn’t work they want to switch to another one. I don’t think that this change in the feeling can give you satisfaction. Somehow you will feel incomplete and will feel that something is missing because each relation is complete in its own way. You cannot just change it, this will create more confusion. I am happy to write about this topic since some days because it gives answers to many people. I have got many positive comments about it and it helps.

4 Replies to “Stay Stable in the Form of Relation you have – 6 Nov 08”

  1. It is true that you can’t be like brother and sister. I like to view my lover as a lover, and I love viewing my brother as my brother. Both relationships are solid and mean a lot to me, but both are completely different. you should work on it! Work on your relationships.

  2. I have a hard time understanding how someone could switch the role their partner plays in the relationship without a problem. If my lover and spouse started to feel like my brother, it would be a problem! There would be something clearly wrong in the relationship that would have to be addressed. I think it’s sort of an excuse when someone claims this because they are too afraid to admit that they aren’t right for each other and need to move on, or they need to find their old sense of love and intimacy. To me, you can’t switch roles like this normally and casually.