Please don't feel guilty for enjoying yourself!

A lot of times my ideas for my blog entries come from conversation with people who are facing issues that other people could be facing as well. The same is true with the case I would like to write about today: a visitor at the Ashram who had big conflicts inside herself when deciding where to travel next. She had plans, options and wishes on where she wanted to go – but would she be selfish if she did?

This lady had a very charitable nature and was active in several organizations. In her free time, she did voluntary work in order to help poor people, be that in her own country or in the third world, in Africa or India. For earning money, she worked in a big company and was very happy that she had now been able to get a six-week holiday, more than she has ever had before. She had wanted to travel and see some of the countries where she helped with her own eyes. She had decided to start in India!

For the beginning, she spent a week with us, as she had wanted to get to know India in a safe environment first. She had not made fixed plans except for the last two weeks when she would do volunteer work for the charity organization in West Bengal that she had been supporting for years. She would teach children in an orphanage. The time in between was free and when she was here, she was having quite some trouble deciding where to go.

She loved the ocean and had seen a lot of pictures of gorgeous Indian beaches. Goa, Kerala – she actually had the wish to go there and relax while lying below the palm trees. At the same time there was the possibility to go join the orphanage earlier or even visit another charity organization, a school for handicapped children.

She was torn in between the options: she really wanted to just take a break and enjoy her time at the beach but it made her feel selfish, egoistic even to be spending her time and money for her pleasure instead of donating both to those charity organizations!

I told her to do what her heart really wanted to do. Go to the beach and relax if this is what you feel like doing. Don’t let this funny feeling of guilt dictate you. Don’t get me wrong – I am running a charity myself and support is always welcome – but you are important as well! You have worked hard for this money, you have lots of stress in your busy company and after this time of travelling you will go back to that. You are worth it to do something for yourself, too.

After all, you are anyway going to spend two weeks teaching those children anyway! It takes a lot of energy, too, and you can only give that if you are relaxed yourself! If you have energy to give at all!

Don’t ever feel guilty about having more than others. Only that makes it possible for you to give – but you need to take care of yourself, too. Don’t make yourself unhappy to make others happy! It won’t work this way!