I wrote about teenagers and their behaviour and I feel that it is the responsibility of the parents, of the society and somehow of the whole system here. How can you expect from a child to do something that you do not do either? I know that many of them feel lonely and do not have anyone to share their feelings, emotions and thoughts. This is why I want to make a place for them, where they can share everything.
In this culture sharing is not important. People divide and own. This is mine and that is yours. This is my car; that is your house. There is so much ego to own something and to keep it only for yourself. Too much individuality. That is why I have the idea to be able to share everything.
This is the true sense of an Ashram. There you can share the material goods as well as thoughts and emotions. This is the difference between an Ashram and a hotel and that is why it is not possible to rent a room in my Ashram. There we share and take care of each other, from the youngest to the oldest. In my Ashram the youngest one is 2 years and the oldest one is around 85 years old. Here old people are normally not at home. They live in old people's homes. Who takes care of them? We would miss the honour of having the older person's blessings. It is great to take care of them and have their blessings.
And you can see the consequences. What we do to our parents our children will do to us. They follow what they see. What we are doing today will reflect in our children in a few years. This is a popular saying, here, too: Never do something to others that you would not want them to do to you. That's why I do not understand why people blame children for their behaviour. They only do what they see. There is nothing wrong with them. We are putting the seeds in them and if you plant the seed of a cactus how can you find a mango in the growing plant? Plant the right seed if you want to have a mango!
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sharing is an important lesson often never learned in Western culture. one of the phrases adults constantly circulate to children is “Share, you need to share” and children are sometimes even rewarded for sharing, but no one will reward you after you are about four or five years old. The actions teach a different principle and it is the principle of ownership.
I love the seed analogy. Thanks Swami Ji!
We cannot blame children for their actions. Why are we so determined to blame adults for their actions? When does a person suddenly become responsible for the wild unconsciousness inside them. If you have ever noticed, perhaps when you have become very angry, that you do not feel yourself, or as though something has taken you over, it has. Imagine being in a state of anger all of the time. Could you ever see things clearly? It is only once anger has subsided that we may realize how foolish our view was. It takes a certain level of consciousness to have a choice about things. When Jesus was being tortured to death on the cross it is said that he shouted “forgive them father for they do not know what they do.” What was he saying? Jesus was simply saying that he did not take the unconsciousness in those around him personally, because they had no choice; they could not see their own foolishness in their desire to violently murder a man who did them no harm. These weren’t bad people. They were just very unconscious. When you see starving children on the news do you rush to feed them every time? Your refrigerator is full but you do not feel these children’s pain. You think of reasons that you cannot afford to share your wealth. Of course, this is not the same thing as torturing someone to death. I am not putting the two together. It is just something to think about.
My experience has been that when I share I get lots back.
you have to prepare your children for the world and not by hiding them from it either. Talk to your children. Talk to them. Discuss behaviors, the good and bad and talk about why maybe some people feel the need to behave certain ways. See what they think about it, discuss why it does not work. Talk about everything! If you do not hide things, they will have less to hide.
We would never think of it this way either. We do not know that there is something strange about everything being owned and separate from everything else. But I have been hurt many times by this separation and ownership, and I’ve hurt others by trying to own to exclusively. It is something that needs to be evaluated.
I love the idea of sharing everything that you have. It is sometimes upsetting when people define exactly what is theirs and not yours. Life is much better when everyone is willing to share.