When we think of a family, we use to think of a married couple, a man and a woman, and their child or children. This is the normal picture of a family. Sometimes there are circumstances in life however that make it impossible for a man or a woman to keep this traditional family setting. It has become more and more usual to see that a child is living only with the mother or only with the father. I have to say that I have much respect for those mothers and fathers raising their child on their own.
In my childhood there was a man here in Vrindavan whose situation everybody knew. He had been married but his wife died only a short time after their baby was born. This man was not rich, he was a simple rickshaw driver. He did not have relatives in town and so he decided to raise this child on his own.
Instead of leaving the small child anywhere with someone else he took him along on his job. He made a sling on his rickshaw into which he lay the baby and he just took it along. From morning to evening he did his job. When there was nobody to drive, he played with his baby. Where else should he have kept it? And most of the people who went with him in his rickshaw gave him a little bit extra money – to help him and his child.
Already in that time I was fascinated by his courage and strength to take care of this child who did not have a mother anymore. Still, when there is a situation when one parent died or when the parents divorced for a good reason or when a mother decides to keep the child even if the father is not ready for commitment, I appreciate the effort that this one person does.
Obviously it is not easy and of course every parent, also if he or she is alone, does his or her best for the little child, just out of love. As a single parent however you have to be mother and father in one. If you are the mother, you will automatically try to cover the male part of parenting, too, and vice versa. It is easier if there are relatives or friends around who can cover that role a little bit but in the end of the day it is you and your baby.
I know from many friends and people with whom I worked and also now from my own experience how much difference it makes to have several people around who can take care of a baby together, different people with whom the child is bonding closely and just more arms to help. This is how I can imagine how important a network of relatives and friends is especially to single moms and dads. If you have a single parent among your friends or if you are one yourself, you will know what I am talking about. Support is very important.
So if you are raising a child on your own, know that there are always people who are willing to help! Know that there are many who show you respect for what you do. And know that you are helping this one child to live a normal life, to be a responsible adult. You are doing something wonderful, even if it is sometimes difficult! Keep the trust that you have the strength in you!
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I too, have so much respect for single parents. Raising a child is very time consuming and difficult. It is difficult for two parents to manage sometimes so if you are on your own, it will be harder still.
I greatly admire the rickshaw driver, he has shown extreme courage and preservence in raising his child without giving it away to people. It must have been hard for a time obviously, but then he knw that in the end it was worth it. Plus keeping the child close to him also meant that he could keep a part of his wife close to him at all times too.