Just now something happened which shows very nicely how our own perception creates our world. I was in the office and chatting with a girl who is a great fan of the diary. She is from Indonesia and her name is Myrna. This was the first chat that I had since a very long time. I normally really don't have time for this. So I copy-paste a part of our chat:
myrna_w (3/23/2008 8:10:42 PM): Hehehe its funny why we should do something with a reason and why the reason has to be logic.
Swamiji (3/23/2008 8:11:12 PM): I love this philosophy of you!
Swamiji (3/23/2008 8:15:50 PM): I don't like limits.
myrna_w (3/23/2008 8:16:07 PM): Great! so it is a job without deadlines.
Swamiji (3/23/2008 8:16:22 PM): Everything of me is without limits.
myrna_w (3/23/2008 8:16:46 PM): Yes. You are a free person.
Swamiji (3/23/2008 8:17:07 PM): Yes, I love to be how I am.
Swamiji (3/23/2008 8:17:21 PM): With no limits.
Swamiji (3/23/2008 8:19:18 PM): You know nobody in this world can imagine that I am chatting with you but I do and I love to do it and I can do anything. Just a free person without limits, that's what I want to be.
Swamiji (3/23/2008 8:19:33 PM): Just be simply whatever you are.
myrna_w (3/23/2008 8:20:44 PM): Yes! you know till now I still don't understand how come a very busy person like you is now chatting with me.
Swamiji (3/23/2008 8:21:37 PM): This is the great mystery of the world!
myrna_w (3/23/2008 8:21:50 PM): Yes, I think so.
myrna_w (3/23/2008 8:22:01 PM): But it's wonderful
myrna_w (3/23/2008 8:22:13 PM): and I am very happy to talk with you!
Swamiji (3/23/2008 8:28:32 PM): But I feel hungry now
Swamiji (3/23/2008 8:28:49 PM): and they are calling me for dinner.
myrna_w (3/23/2008 8:28:57 PM): Ok
Swamiji (3/23/2008 8:28:58 PM): Everybody is waiting
Swamiji (3/23/2008 8:29:06 PM): at the dinner table.
myrna_w (3/23/2008 8:29:13 PM): Have a great dinner!
Swamiji (3/23/2008 8:29:23 PM): Thank you!
So we ended the talk and I went outside but saw that they are only preparing the pizza which still had to bake in the oven. But in that time I was really convinced that someone was calling me for dinner. This is how your mind can play with you and how you can create your world with your thoughts. I was hungry and it was also around our normal dinner time. When I saw people around the table I thought dinner was ready. And then, because of this perception, my mind played a trick and made me think somebody is calling. It is wonderful to see how your mind influences your perception of the world. And there will not be two people whose perception is exactly the same. And when the perception is very different the other person will not like you, see you in a different light and maybe even think you are a bad person. In Hindi we have this saying: You see the world in the colour which is the colour of the glasses you are wearing. This is how your mind creates your world.
I received a mail in which I am asked if it would be possible to tell more about the reason of my sadness. I am open with my feelings and this I shared but I want to respect the wish of an individual who asked me not to talk about this issue in public.