A common and wrong Perception: Meditation is not Mind Control

Some time ago we had a visitor at the Ashram who had come for an Ayurveda Yoga Holiday, not only hoping to get relief for some of her physical issues but also to find a solution for the unhappiness she experienced and which she knew arrived from a mental problem. When I talked to her however, she was more than surprised about my suggestion what she could do about it.

This woman had actually thought that she would come here and, apart from her daily yoga classes and massages, would meditate to learn and practice controlling her mind. I basically told her to do the opposite: let your mind run free! I would like to explain this to you.

A lot of people already know that their own unhappiness is not caused by anything from outside. They are aware of the fact that it is their mind that doesn’t let them be happy and not their neighbour, boss, partner or work. They have read enough to know that they have to work on themselves and make a change inside themselves as they cannot change others anyway. The solution that many people see is, and not wrongly, meditation.

The wrong conclusion however is that you should, in this way, learn to control your mind.

I believe that this combination of words in itself shows why I don’t like it: mind control. Can that be a good thing? Obviously not for someone else’s mind but also not for your own! It is a common wrong perception in many places that meditation is used to control your mind. It is not – meditation helps you relax! Relax because you don’t need to be in control, relax because you are in this very moment and consciously so! It is not about you being in full control at all times, because that is exactly what many people tend to do much too much!

This was the same case with the woman I talked to: she thought about every situation that has occurred in the past, analyzed it and tried to draw conclusions which made her think about every possible situation in future. She would then influence the present and try to control even what others did according to what she thought would most probably happen. The consequence: people were unhappy with her, she got unhappy with herself and on top of all her mind was all the time so super busy that she started having serious issues with stress and something that bordered on depression.

She is not at all the only one in this situation! If you are even a bit similar to this, let me tell you that meditation can help you – but not by gaining control over your mind. I know you think that your mind causes all that by again and again wandering off in possible directions. If you believe by focusing on one thing, you will manage to keep your mind from doing that, you are wrong. The opposite will happen – it will wander away far more often!

Your mind cannot, however, be without your body. So it will come back, no matter what. You don’t need to follow your mind where it goes. Just stay and keep on doing what you are doing and it will come back. By doing that, letting your mind free but not paying attention to it, instead paying attention on what you are doing – be that cooking, dancing, working, reading, walking or whatever else – you will notice that your mind will get used to not wandering around!

With time, you will enjoy not being in control but instead doing simply what you are doing. That is meditation: being aware of what you are doing in that moment. And that has nothing to do with forceful mind control – not even when it is about your own mind!