I know I have written about arranged marriages last year, too, and I explained a little bit more about how it was in former times. I believe, just how I wrote before, too, that the basic idea behind arranged marriages is not wrong: love can grow with time. So now there is just a very big difference between what is happening nowadays and what was going on then.
When people were living in their villages in former times, they already decided early who would be the future spouse of their child. And then the children grew up together, developed love to each other and one day married. Their love could grow. But the parents were not choosing like nowadays by looking at the skin colour or anything like that. It was not this insulting process of choosing like now. And I do believe that love can grow.
We were talking about the question if this means taking away the freedom of the children and that is one point that I do not appreciate because they do not keep their freedom in this, it is true and I see and have seen this realistically. The main point however that I want to make is that what is happening today is wrong. You cannot make the choice of a partner like a contest of who is most beautiful. Yesterday I mentioned the factors of physical closeness and devotion without ego and I think I will write more about this in the next days.
Related posts
The Consequences of domestic Violence and arranged Marriage – 10 Jun 16
Do Westerners divorce too easily or do Indians stick around too long? – 17 Mar 16
Marriage is a Bond of Love – Kids prove that Gender doesn’t matter! – 15 Mar 16
Divorce is not an Option – not even when Husband and Wife only have Sex with other People! – 6 Apr 15
What do Bride and Groom feel at their arranged Wedding? – 2 Dec 13
The big Question at an Indian Wedding: are they marrying a Stranger? – 28 Nov 13
Indian Fairytale Weddings – not so much Fun for Bride and Groom – 27 Nov 13
The Indian Wedding Setup through the Eyes of a Westerner – 26 Nov 13
Indian Hospitality makes sure non-Indian Guests get the Chance to attend Indian Weddings – 25 Nov 13
It is funny that many westerners may feel disturbed by the concept of arranged marriage while many “love marriages” in the West are not based on love, but are rather a contest of beauty and status. The imagined differences between the two types of marriage are not so great, if they even exist.
Does it really matter if it’s an arranged marriage or not? I mean in the end everyone is just going to be wasting their lives playing a role anyway.
I wonder why the tradition changed over time. At least when children were arranged to marry, they actually had plenty of time to get to know each other and develop love. Even if they weren’t attracted to each other or have a lot in common, two children reared together would certainly share some kind of bond and love. I think that’s at least better than forcing two complete strangers to marry.