Showing Love without Showing off - 11 Aug 10

As a reaction to yesterday’s diary my friend Deniz wrote ‘I don't think Western people should do this so much in their own countries either. I see it as a form of exhibitionism, private behavior which should be kept private.’

I believe love is not for exhibition. It is a subject of consciousness. You do not need to show it off or prove it to anybody, it is for you and you and your partner know how much you have or don’t have. It is nobody else’s business. Love is in between the two of you and there is no need to practically have intercourse on the street just to make sure the world knows you love each other. Love is not for showing off.

It is also not for hiding though. When you love somebody or something you should not hold back in showing it when you have the feeling that you want to express. When you say ‘I love you’ to the other one, it is not exhibition of your love, it is an expression of your deepest sentiments. If you hug someone, and be it in public, I think it is also not necessarily showing off.

Of course the physical acts should be done with respect for your surrounding. This I would say for anybody and wherever he or she is, if in India or any Western country. What would you do if you were at home? How much affection do you show if you are sitting with older people like your parents or grand-parents? How much affection do you show if you are sitting with children under ten?

I think it is not any problem if you show love and affection by hugging somebody or holding hands. When it reaches sexual behavior, it is too much for your grandmother I think and thus too most for the normal person who sees you on the street and doesn’t even know you.

Real and true Love from within your heart is something beautiful and there is no problem with showing it without showing it off.

Our friend Su from New York celebrated her birthday today with the children at the Ashram by sponsoring their food. They remember her well and when they saw the notice board they talked about her and all wish her a happy birthday!

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This Post Has 6 Comments

  1. Jessica Baer

    You’ve written what i’ve felt about public affection since i was a little girl. It just didn’t “feel” right to me.

  2. Loch from America

    “Practically having intercourse on the street.” Hahaha, have you seen this? Maybe in New york….

  3. Carl rom MI

    I don’t try to hide my love but sometimes I do and I don’t know why and sometimes I try to fix it by showing it off, haha. But love also “cures” this anyway. Strange strange.

  4. Jeremy

    Great entry as usual Swami Ji. Can’t wait to read more.

  5. Emily

    I like that you mentioned the guideline of showing the amount of public affection that you would be comfortable showing your grandma or a small child. That seems like the right amount of affection appropriate for other people to see. Besides, its actually a special treat when you save your true affection for your loved one in private!

  6. Tricia

    I agree, I am not a big fan of PDA (public displayed affection) in my opinion too it should be kept between the couple, not between the couple in the whole street who is watching. But I also agree with you in that if you love someone you should not hide it either.

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