Trust in Friendship instead of Expectations – 08 Mar 08

City:
Vrindavan
Country:
India

At the moment we have three very nice women from Austria here as guests, who got to know me last year when I was in Salzburg. They went to the bazaar today to buy some gifts and nice things and when they came back they told that a monkey had stolen the glasses of one of them. Actually this happens often here and we warn people about it but if you need glasses to see something you will still wear them. But the people around are normally very helpful and know what to do: they brought some biscuits and threw them to the monkey who, knowing that this would taste better than the glasses, let them go to catch the biscuits. It is a trick that makes both happy, the monkey and the one who needs his glasses! She got her glasses back and says that it was a special experience.

One subject is still going on in my mind and I want to tell about my feelings here. I like to give my friendship with Govind again as an example for a perfect relationship if something like this exists. Since he has left Vrindavan on the 24th February we did not have any contact. I do not expect him to call and he doesn't expect me to call. I do not want anyone to have expectations on me. This would create a pressure that I don't want to have and that I cannot afford. I do not want to create any pressure on anyone but I also do not want to have pressure from anyone. And expectations like on how often I need to call or that I have to spend a certain amount of time with someone create pressure. If I do not do that what will happen? Will I loose a friend? No, I do not want to live with this fear! I carry so much love in my heart, for everyone and of course especially for my loved ones, my friends and my family. They have a place in my heart and I am always thinking of them with all my love.

I think in the West friendships do not have this trust as a base. I trust that my friend will stay my friend even if I do not call him because I trust on his love and I trust that he knows that I love him. Even in families it is very different in the countries where I usually work. People tell me of fights with family members, times in which siblings do not have contact with each other and that they do not really know their own blood-related family. It just couldn't happen in my family and this is where I see that the trust is missing already in the family. The love is missing. I want to bring this back and with my friendships all over the world I want to give an example for the love that can be between two beings without expectations, without conditions. Only love.
 

5 Replies to “Trust in Friendship instead of Expectations – 08 Mar 08”

  1. it is hard to trust friends sometimes, I mean maybe in India it’s different but in the US no one has to be your friend, and with everyone moving around all the time it is hard to keep friends even if you remain on good terms with them. I think that honesty and trust are very hard in friendships because they are so temporary and undervalued.

  2. It is hard to trust friends, it is nice when they call because then you know that they are still your friend. There isn’t a lot for trust in anything lasting in the West. There is always something new to be abandoned for and to abandon others for. In our personal lives, in the television we watch, in the technology we buy. Always something better and different. Even your family you can’t count on. That is why I like it when my friends call- then I know they are still my friends. I want to not care if they call or not. But the fact is I do care. Wish I didn’t.