Read this if you feel you have no real Friends in this World!

Read this if you feel you have no real Friends in this World! – 4 Sep 12

Post author:Balendu
Post published:04/09/2012
Post category:Friends
Post comments:0 Comments

In my counseling work I frequently meet people who tell me that they feel alone and are looking for a partner or at least some friends. They say that they see happy people in couples or groups and together with friends all the time. There are coworkers who do their work in a team, there are couples who are happily doing their shopping together, who kiss and laugh on the road and there are friends who have a discussion in a restaurant or who are just hanging out with each other. Only they seem to be alone on this world. Today I want to write my blog post to all of the people who feel in this way.

The first thing I would like to tell you is that you probably don’t see the reality properly. It is hardly like this that everybody loves their coworkers, jokes around while working with them and has a great team. You, the customer, only see a two or five minute time frame of their relation with each other. That does not reflect however how they really feel for each other. There are many people who have to work together but who don’t get in tune with each other at all. In the same way there are people who are on a date and laugh and smile but already know that it was the last time they met the other one. From outside you may only pass one glance and assume everyone else is happy while you are not. That is however not the case. See that there are many other people walking around, too, who have problems, just like you.

This should however not be your main reason to cheer up – although it psychologically helps to know that there are others sitting in the same boat. But you need to change your thinking to come out of this boat!

Open your eyes and think whether you are really that much alone. Okay, maybe you don’t have a full group of friends around you whom you can tell everything and who altogether go out to have fun and joke around. Maybe you don’t even have that one best friend that everyone praises, the one with whom you can really share without holding back. But if you look around you, there will be people with whom you get along well. They may not be people with whom you could spend days without getting bored but they are there and you enjoy talking to them. That can be a family member or also a nice coworker, that can be a neighbor whom you just meet from time to time or that can be even someone who goes to have lunch at the same place that you do. You are not alone in this world!

Now, after seeing that there are some people at least available for you to talk to, you may need to get a little bit more open. Don’t hide yourself away behind your computer or television. Of course you can make friends on social networks but not by playing games, watching movies or reading random things on the internet. Get active and spend time with activities that you like and that other people may also do. There you can get in touch with more like-minded people. Be open to spend some more time with them or your existing acquaintances. That can be difficult if you have been a lot on your own because you are not used to it anymore. But don’t get afraid, don’t pull back and make up some kind of excuse. This is what you need to do if you want to change something and bring more social interaction into your life.

Finally, don’t keep the expectation that people immediately have to become your ‘best friend forever’. It does not happen for everyone just as it is displayed on television. Real life is different. A normal friendship also means that sometimes you get a bit less close and sometimes you are closer again. You may have different opinions on topics but can still be friends. In fact, that is what is normal. So when you meet someone, just be happy to meet. Simply enjoy how nice the moment is without planning the future.

Relax, go out, be friendly and interact with people in daily life. That will make a big change in your life and you will feel alive and among people. Try it, it is worth it!