Today we went to the funeral of Regina’s grandfather, Celina’s great-grandfather. He died at the age of 89 years after some illness and a life full of adventures and events. He has seen three generations after him.
Yesterday Jens said that with the mind you can find 100 reasons why it was good for him to leave now, but the feelings will always say: we miss him. Of course it is the loss of a family member and no matter how many reasons you can logically find to be able to say that it was good for the person who left, for those who are still here, the grief and sadness will come.
We attended the funeral and for Yashendu and me it was the first Christian funeral, the first funeral here in Germany. I was once in London, a few years back, and attended the funeral of an old Indian man and of course it was a ceremony according to Hindu religion, so just a westernized version of what I know. But today was a Christian ceremony.
If I compare the ceremony and the rituals, I have to say that the ways of saying good-bye are very similar. There are some differences: in India people wear white whereas here they wear black. The ashes today were put into earth while in India we give them to the river. The body was burnt before while in India the actual ceremony is the burning.
When the urn was already in the earth, the priest spoke some words and although I do not understand much German I understood that he is putting earth to earth, ashes to ashes and dust to dust. This reminded me of how in India we talk about the five elements that the body is made of and to which it returns: earth, water, fire, wind and space. We say the same thing: the body returns to what it is made of. And the soul returns to that one big soul. And what is left here are many good memories of the time with the deceased and loved person.
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“with the mind you can find 100 reasons why it was good for him to leave now, but the feelings will always say: we miss him”This really says it all, doesn’t it?
89 years is a good long life. Can’t imagine all the things he’d seen.
It is so comforting when the priest speaks. Makes it seem really final, like it’s actually over.
I think that the act of cremation after a death is a beautiful process. It really allows the elements of the body to be returned back to the elements of the earth. It is a releasing and letting go process that opens up space for new life. I personally disagree with burials in coffins. It traps the body in a hard, enclosed space. It takes much longer for the body to actually be recycled back into the earth. And now there are mass amounts of land reserved for cemeteries that hold a very sad energy and resonance. This land could be used for nurturing and loving rebirth, such as a garden or park. I, personally, will want to be cremated after I leave my body behind.
While obviously there is a large amount of grief for the departed, Christian funerals, often called thanksgiving ceremonies, are as much a celebration for their life, and the fact that they are on their way to heaven. Obviously its a subject little understood, but we Christians understand that death is simply a gateway to greater things, and so usually a air of jubilance surrounds these occasions.