Monika's alcoholic and violent Father - something you have to accept as Fate? - 18 Dec 14

When we got to know about Monika's accident, we immediate decided we would take her to the hospital. Of course, we wanted to talk with her parents before and so her mother came to school the next day. Having talked to her, I even wrote a blog entry on her, without revealing her identity. She told me that she didn't mind though, and that’s how I am now writing the whole story here. Yesterday I already told you about the financial situation at their home – but money is not the only problem!

The biggest problem for Monika's mother is her husband. It is not only that he doesn't work. No, no day goes by without him getting drunk. This is something that his wife told us when she came to school, his daughter told us at school and both of them told us when we were at their home. He didn't want to admit but had to when these two ladies insisted.

Somehow he always finds money for his addiction. If he doesn't earn the few rupees on his own, he searches the house for his wife’s earnings and steals them to buy cigarettes and alcohol.

That not being enough, he drunkenly starts fights with his brothers, neighbors and complete strangers. And of course with his wife and children. The insults that Monika tells us he uses for her are nothing that a 12-year-old should have heard! He comes home in night, wakes up everyone, although his wife has to get up for work at 5 in the morning, and starts fighting.

When the fighting is not enough, he gets violent as well. Against his wife and children. Against his daughter who, just some months ago, burnt her whole face, chest and arms! He hits her – on the back. Considerate of him, isn't it?

That is where the big question came from that we again asked Monika’s mother when we went to the hospital: why don't you leave? Take the kids and go, don't let them grow up in such an environment!

She told that she had given her little daughter to her parents for that reason: she doesn't want to leave her with her husband when she goes to work! When the kids were all small, she would go to her parents for months at a time but now, with school holidays being limited and her going to work, she cannot.

Why don't you just go? You don't get anything from this family who doesn't speak to you, your parents are the ones who give you pots and clothes when you don't have the money to buy them and you yourself earn the money with which you raise your children! The only thing you have there is a room to sleep in – and that you could rent in a tenth of your income!

She said she actually had thought of it and even told her parents about it. But with their reply she lost all courage to do such a thing: “Daughter, this is your destiny, you cannot fight against your fate.”

So better to earn money for your drunkard husband and accept that you and your children get beaten! You can imagine our emotions when hearing these words! There is more to the story of this family – that I will tell you about tomorrow!

We will concentrate on our work, on helping Monika and you can be assured that not one rupee of our and your support will go to her father! We will be the ones directly paying any bills and also our support for the family will be direct, so that no money can be used for anything else than its purpose!

You can help us supporting Monika and her treatment! Here you can read again about her accident and here how you can donate!

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  1. Peter

    I would love to “chat” with her father…. but I can’t afford to be arrested in another country 😉

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