In a healing session somebody asked me: “I am very aggressive and often shout at others without really wanting it or meaning it. What can I do about that anger?”
I gave him a very practical advice: When you have a discussion with someone and you feel that you get angry and will shout around, take a glass of water and drink the water. Take a deep breath and calm down. What happens when you get angry? I always say that your eyes are closed and your mouth is open. The eyes are not closed in a physical way but you cannot really realize what the physical eyes see. You do not realize who is in front of you, what you are doing, what you are saying and what the situation is like. So you are blind with open eyes.
Anger is directing you and talking through you. It is not your truth that is talking and that is why you might regret afterwards what you said. You should open your eyes and shut your mouth in time. To have your eyes open means to be aware of what you are doing. Try to keep the silence when the anger comes up. This will help you to see inside yourself and to think. When you are yelling there is no space in the mind for thinking. It is unnecessary to shout around and it can hurt others, too.
Anger is a fire that burns you and others. When you feel that it comes drink some water and let the hormones calm down, too, before you hurt others with words in anger that you do not really mean. I don’t say that you should suppress your emotions. You need to let all emotions flow. You can also let your anger flow but do not hurt others. Why do others have to suffer from your anger? When you feel that the fire of anger burns you from inside, just take a pillow and punch in it. Let your anger flow! Allow yourself to be angry! Suppression is never good.